Tuesday
24Mar2009
Wishless Candles
Tue, March 24, 2009 The tiny flame is not to guide anyone home that is no longer at this home.
It is not some beacon for the non-existent, the as if.
I will no longer light a candle and wait and wish for what isn’t.
There is no ritual for what will not change, or who will not.
No more candles for magic.
I will light a candle for what was. For what is gone. For what is not coming back.
I learned this tonight. There are two candles. For 2.
Candles for letting go. Grown-up candles.
Reader Comments (10)
<3
did you write this?
i take that back, of course you did. i love you. i hope you can get through this day okay. celebrate it for her. you know she would want that.
I wish I could hug you in person tonight Lucy. Happy Birthday dear Torri.
Crayon and Bright Eyes.. the remainders of what is actually tangible...
Beautifully done. Perfect song. It was our family theme song for our brother Jim when he died and it still brings back all those memories.
I have somehow felt this journey of acceptence with you Lucy....I think this is a wonderful thing for you...there has to come a point where we no longer live int the sadness and the all consuming wishes and wonders....to reach that point where we can somehow accept and move on is just a more than wonderful thing...somehow freeing? I admire your strength, I admire the fact that you took your broken heart and made sure other kids were taken care of.....I think you should be very proud of yourself....or at least smile a little that you didn't let Torri's death be meaningless.
Godspeed.
Christine
think of you all every day. let's hug soon. Sue, I'll give her one from you!
we say we accept.. to a certain extent in time we come to this conclusion.. we realize that they are not coming home.. we accept.. and then we feel bad in some way for saying we accept.. we accept in time to a certain degree.. we move on.. BUT, they always go with us.. we move on, we move forward without them, somehow.. not sure that we accept but rather we do not have a choice.. we must persevere! somehow! we laugh, and yes, we cry... we miss, and yes, we move forward.. our hearts forever tied! as two flames, two hearts, forever entwined!
if she can, she does..
if she can't, she knew!